


[insert fire safety slogan]

by jimatoshi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fire Safety, Gen, Shenanigans, there is no actual fire, wait no thats a lie but its a controlled fire i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:15:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28256034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jimatoshi/pseuds/jimatoshi
Summary: If you set off a fire alarm once, you get labeled as a troublemaker.If you set off a fire alarm twice, you get labeled as an idiot.Thanks to their captain's idiocy, the Karasuno Volleyball Club has to attend a mandatory fire safety event. It goes 100% as planned.---Written as a bonus for The Orange Court discord server's Winter Solstice Exchange. The theme was fire. Thanks for a great exchange, everyone <3!
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	[insert fire safety slogan]

If you set off a fire alarm once, you get labeled as a troublemaker.

If you set off a fire alarm _twice_ , you get labeled as an idiot who doesn’t know how a fire alarm looks.

Sawamura Daichi had graduated from being a troublemaker to being an idiot. As captain of the volleyball team, who already had a bad reputation for being problem students between their yelling, breaking things, and ~~knocking wigs off of…~~ yelling and breaking things, his downgrade followed him and was applied to the whole batch. So when the school hosted a fire safety event, attendance was voluntary for everyone except for the boys’ volleyball team. This is to say, the school hosted a fire safety event exclusively for the boys’ volleyball team.

The event started straightforward enough, a simple talk about fire procedures and the importance of having a fire plan. Daichi had a brief hope that they might be finished in time to still get in a short practice. This hope is fleeting though, as soon they pulled out the tables to announce there will be… activities.

The first problem with the activities was their mere existence meant the whole ordeal would take much longer than expected. The second problem with the activities was they required being split into groups. Three groups, to be exact.

As soon as they heard this, Tanaka and Noya conjoined at the hip, and then asked Kiyoko to join their group. She said no, but they looked happy about it anyways. Meanwhile, Hinata and Kageyama were declaring war over who would “win” the noncompetitive activities. Hinata, seeing the strength of Tanaka and Noya’s comradery, decided to join them, while Kageyama recruited Yachi and Yamaguchi because he wanted “smart people who aren’t Tsukishima.” Seeing his options for smart people quickly dwindling, Hinata attempted to recruit Tsukishima. Tsukishima said no. He was now an official member of their group. Since their group needed just one more person, Tanaka and Noya hurriedly debated over who their final member should be until Noya proudly declared it to be Kinoshita because “he’s good at this kind of thing,” with absolutely no clarification on what kind of “thing” he was referring to.

Daichi took one look at the Tanaka-Noya-Hinata-Tsukishima-Kinoshita group and declared they will be splitting by school year instead. With groups settled, they all went to begin their respective activities.

* * *

When Daichi thought of activities, he imagined planning fire escapes, maybe some sort of demonstration of how fire alarms work and how not to press them on accident. When they walked into their station the first thing the third years saw was fire. Real, actual fire. Daichi froze. Sugawara’s eyes seemed to sparkle. Asahi looked like he was going to pass out. Kiyoko continued to walk towards the fire, unbothered.

The instructor quickly put out the fire with the extinguisher, explaining the proper steps with an acronym to remember them by. After the demonstration was done, they were reminded that using a fire extinguisher should be a last resort only if exits are blocked and only if they are comfortable using them. And the best way to get comfortable putting out fires is, apparently, by putting out fires. So the instructor restarted the fire and asked who wanted a go at it.

Sugawara went first, with a comment on how it could be useful to know later. He only got in a little bit of trouble for pretending like he was going to shoot Asahi before he pulled out the pin and flawlessly put out the fire. Everyone clapped. Next up was Kiyoko, who got through the ordeal with little fuss. Finally it was Daichi’s turn. He pulled the pin and… it didn’t come out? He tried again and it stayed. He pulled one last time and accidentally knocked the pin out, dropped the fire extinguisher which hit the handle, spraying a bit in random directions. The instructor used a second extinguisher to put out the fire, took the opportunity to explain that dropped fire extinguishers could be damaged and should not be used, and kicked the group out of his station before they could cause any other harm to themselves or the equipment. Asahi sent a thank you to the gods for sparing him.

* * *

While the third years narrowly avoided death, the second years’ first task was learning what to do when your clothes are on fire. Luckily, instead of real fire, this demonstration used yellow and red streamers. The instructor explained how stop, drop, and roll only applied to when you yourself were on fire and to demonstrate they would play a game where they reached a goal (the “building exit”) but if you were hit by the streamers you had to stop drop and roll. If you got hit and didn’t, you died. If you stop drop and rolled without being hit, you lost time.

The game began and nearly immediately Tanaka died for trying to sneak ahead without stopping (dropping and rolling). After being caught, Noya promised to avenge Tanaka and defeat the fire for him. Tanaka shed a tear at the sheer manliness. By the time they finished their scene and paid attention to the state of the others, Ennoshita was rolling on the ground and (intentionally?) blocking the path for Narita close to the start of the maze while Kinoshita, true to Noya’s assessment, must be good at this kind of thing as he was already waiting for the others at the finish line. Teary goodbyes finished, Noya went to continue his journey. Tanaka, not one to sit around and watch others, looked at his still burning clothes when an idea struck. He removed the streamers from his shirt, held them up to his mouth, and blew.

He was… _a fire breathing dragon_.

Elated at his discovery, Tanaka proceeded to rampage the maze, killing the rest of the second years, with Kinoshita the only survivor.

* * *

Hinata looked over at the second years and sighed listlessly. The activity for the first years was, according to him, “the worst.” While the others were running around making or putting out their real and fake fires, they were stuck with a quiz. That’s not even an activity!! It’s just a test but smaller!

However, there was one positive to a quiz… you can win! Hinata might not be the smartest, but he’s pretty sure Kageyama is even stupider. To pacify their need for everything to be a competition, the instructor split the quiz into small one-minute relays where she could count the number of correct answers they got for each relay. The goal of the quiz is simple: hot or not hot? The instructor explained their goal was to determine which things are likely fire hazards or would be dangerous to touch during a fire. Hinata thinks he has it in the bag, so he volunteers to go first.

Question 1: Refrigerator.

Hinata’s answer: not hot (it’s cold!)

Correct answer: hot

Hinata riots. He knew 100% for sure that refrigerators are cold, how can they be hot! The instructor explained how to keep the inside cold they release heat yada yada fire hazard etc etc. By the time the explanation is over, his timer ran out and Hinata had a grand total of 0 points, to the great joy of Kageyama. He decided to take this opportunity to go next and quickly beat Hinata.

Question 1: Doorknob

Kageyama’s answer: not hot (it is a doorknob)

Correct answer: hot

Kageyama didn't fight the answer and let the instructor quickly explain how in a fire a metal doorknob is dangerous to touch because it could be hot from a fire on the other side of the door.

Question 2: Wooden door

Kageyama’s answer: hot (Having learned from his previous answer that he should consider what happens to the wood in a fire, Kageyama remembers wood catches on fire. Wooden door in a fire = hot)

Correct answer: not hot

Kageyama was now ready to riot as the instructor once again took her time to explain how instead of touching the knob, you should touch the door itself to check if its warm or not, letting you know if its safe to pass through. Obviously though if the door itself is on fire, do not touch it. Kageyama’s time ran out and he, too, finished with a score of 0. Unable to accept these results, Hinata and Kageyama declared a rematch and continued to rematch until it was time to change stations, with Yamaguchi, Yachi, and Tsukishima getting no chance to play the quiz.

They score 0 every time.

Yachi was impressed; Hinata had even managed to confuse himself enough to declare fire itself was “not hot” with 100% certainty.

* * *

After they “successfully" completed their respective activities, the groups shuffled around 2 more times so everyone got to do everything. If Hinata had streamers stuck in his hair and Tanaka’s eyebrows looked just a little bit shorter than they were before, Daichi pretended he didn’t see it. They had made it through the safety event alive and sure there might not be time for practice, but at least they could all go home at a reasonable time….

Except there was one more event. A scavenger hunt. Despite Noya’s excitement, they were not hunting for fires. Instead, each group was given a stack of sticky notes and their goal was to stick them on as many fire alarms in the school as possible (“without setting them off” the vice principal added, looking directly at Daichi)

The third years were blue, the second years were green, and the first years were yellow.

* * *

As soon as they set off into the building, Sugawara took the blue sticky notes from Daichi’s hands, claiming he “couldn’t be trusted near fire alarms.” Daichi attempted to defend himself but honestly, when you’ve set off a fire alarm in two separate petty arguments, there’s not much ground to stand on. The conversation died down and they walked in silence for a bit, Sugawara posting the notes up as they pass each fire alarm. There’s absolutely no need for this to be a group activity, or really an activity at all. Daichi stops in his tracks. He’s supposed to be keeping these idiots out of trouble, not causing more himself.

Kiyoko was the first to notice. She stopped and looked back at him, prompting Sugawara and Asahi to do the same. Daichi stumbled through an apology, for wasting their day so close to nationals when everyone could be practicing or at least resting. Sugawara just poked fun at him, even Asahi laughed at how he’s being so serious. Daichi is about to take back his apology when Kiyoko spoke.

“I thought today was kind of fun.”

* * *

Narita chose to ignore what sounded like yelling in the distance. In fact, he chose to ignore a lot of things right now. He was ignoring how Tanaka and Noya have been planning to sabotage the other teams, he was ignoring how they’ve wrapped Kinoshita (the holder of the sticky notes) into their plot, and he was definitely ignoring Ennoshita staring at him like he knew that Narita knows something. Which is technically true, but if Ennoshita would stop hawking over Tanaka and Noya for 2 seconds, it was easy to see through Kinoshita’s attempts to “act casual.” But, despite how obvious Kinoshita was, Narita kept his silence. Surely the other groups would notice anyways…

* * *

“We’ve definitely marked this alarm already.”

The first 2 times it had happened, Yamaguchi had thought maybe he was mixed up, or they had forgotten it, but 3 times was too many for them to have just missed all the fire alarms. This leads to one conclusion: The sticky notes were being stolen! Seeing as all of the fire alarms they’re passing only had green notes, the culprits must be the second years' team.

Hurt by the dishonesty of their senpai, the only path forward was revenge. As Hinata and Kageyama started to talk about who can steal more green sticky notes, they’re stopped by Tsukishima. He’s got a smirk on his face that Yamaguchi knows by now means he’s serious as he took the yellow stack away from Hinata and told them to steal the blue ones instead because _he’s got a plan_.

* * *

When everyone convened in the gym for the great sticky note tally, Narita took stock of the other groups. The third years seemed to be happy, so they probably hadn’t noticed, but the first years definitely wouldn’t be winning poker any time soon with those faces. Narita continued to avoid eye contact with Ennoshita. _Should be interesting._

The votes are counted.

Blue: 0

Green: 20

Yellow: 0

Narita realized just how stupid his teammates are.

The vice principal did not, and immediately started chastising the first and third years for not taking fire safety seriously when the unthinkable happened. Tsukishima Kei said _Tanaka-senpai~_ in the fakest sweet voice Narita had ever heard. It was equal parts hilarious and disgusting, but he kept a straight face for Tsukishima’s grand reveal, that Tanaka had stacks of used blue and yellow sticky notes in his pockets. As Tanaka looked at Kinoshita, betrayed, Kinoshita pulled out of his pockets the actual blue and yellow sticky notes he’d stolen and all hell broke loose. In all of the chaos, Daichi was on his way across the gym to scold Tanaka and Noya when he got bumped. Directly into the fire alarm.

If you set off a fire alarm twice, you’re an idiot. If you set off a fire alarm three times, you’re a lost cause.

The Karasuno Volleyball Club were dismissed from the fire safety event.

**Author's Note:**

> So this ended up including way more actual fire safety than intended. :woopsie:
> 
> I think everything I said was accurate, but obligatory disclaimer to not take your fire safety advice from a fanfic.
> 
> Inspiration for the activities comes from this blog: https://teachingmama.org/fire-safety-activities-for-kids/ which is directed at preschoolers and also from my own fire extinguisher training.
> 
> I'm imagining that only one of the instructors knew they were going to a high school and the rest assumed it was an elementary school, which is why the intensity of the activities is so... varied.


End file.
